Free Meat for Everybody!

Stupid Wacko Liberals otherwise known as Peta!

        Peta the wacko animal rights group wants that bastard of liberalism, Illinoise, to install highway signs in the memory of some dead cows that were killed in a traffic accident out on the interstate. I have to honest and state I didn't know about the cows.  But I would have been pissed if I lived close and didn't get some of the meat. My favorite cut is the Rib eye, but I don't ever turn down any steak, or hamburger, or any kind of meat for that matter.
        Once there was a refrigerated truck carrying chickens that had flipped over on the highway and my buddy who ran a tow truck called me up and said get over here with all the coolers you got. Needless to say everybody in my neighborhood was invited to a barbecued chicken cookout. We all had a great time and the meat was delicious.

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        Ashley Byrne of Peta says the effort to erect the signs is part of a national campaign to call attention to how cattle suffer in the meat industry. I recommend they put them signs up just before an exit that has a lot of restaurants, cause you know it'll just remind people to eat. I hate to be selfish Ashley, especially at a time like this when you are obviously in mourning over your latest lost love interest. But I'm so hungry I could eat a horse. Which one was your partner anyway, Bessie or Flo?